Change is Inevitable
October 11, 2022
73 days!
I mentioned in yesterday's blog, that I had identified some things that I knew caused me anxiety when facing the work week. If you don't already know, I am a teacher! I have always loved my job, loved working with students, and I love the county that I work in. After being diagnosed with breast cancer last year though, my feelings toward work greatly changed. The passion that I once felt about being in the classroom, had diminished.
When I was new in sobriety, I had initially hoped the anxiety I had been feeling the past year or two about work, would fade once I had quit drinking. Unfortunately though, I quickly realized that the same anxiety I had about work, before I quit drinking, returned. I discussed this with my family intensely prior to returning to work in September. Although, I truly did not know what my game plan would be, I knew that I needed to be home MORE, and my family needed me MORE! I had been unknowingly absent from my family for a long time. It was time to start rebuilding US!
Although I had conquered the first step, and figured out that I needed to make a CHANGE, I had absolutely NO CLUE how I was going to initiate that change. I had been a teacher for the past 18+ years. What would we do financially? What would I do emotionally? Would people be upset with me? Would I be letting others down? I truly felt like I knew what was the right decision, but I still had some hurdles to overcome.
I returned in September to the classroom, and all I knew to do was PRAY about my situation. I had to pray...I had to give up control, and let God guide me. I had to trust that HE would take care of me and my family during this time of uncertainty. After all, He had already blessed me with a great workplace. He had blessed me with a group of incredible students. He had blessed me with a community of co-workers that truly seemed to care about my situation and what was best for "our" students. I had to give my worries to my Higher Power, allow Him to guide me, and trust in His guidance of others.
Last week, after weeks of prayers, I truly felt that my prayers had been answered. My school had a part-time position open up. By taking a part-time position, this would allow me more time at home! This would allow me to get to my necessary doctor's appointments. This would still allow me to help provide for my family financially too! Although change can be extremely difficult, I know that change is inevitable. It is also necessary for personal growth to occur.
My last "official" day at Sunrise Elementary will be this Friday, October 14th. That is still hard for me to fathom. But, the great news is that I return on October 24th, still as a teacher, with a new sense of passion for the people that surround and care about my well-being. They have put their trust in me, so now I have to work on maintaining that trust. I will be part-time, and I am looking forward to the extra time that I will have to spend with my family and even just simply spend at my home.
I will never forget the incredible support that I have received from my team members, other staff, my administration, and everyone else along the way! Their kindness has been remarkable! I truly feel blessed in so many ways.
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